Wander Lust

Seven years ago, I’d just left my life in West Africa. I look so young!

My life has turned into what I’d always dreaded it would. Though comfortable and quite happy, I have a cell phone, a cheap lease on a great apartment, a comfortable bed to lie in at night and my dreaded sign of commitment to staying in one spot for a while: Saran Wrap (of all things).

I’m not sure why it’s not okay with me to be here, to stay here, to raise my child here. It feels like so much of a waste, of missed opportunities, of settling. There are so many places I’d like to go, to live. Travel and adventure is in my blood and I can’t help but miss it, comfortable life be damned.

Almost every person I know is settled. Kid. House. Marriage. But it doesn’t feel right for me. Not in my youth. I want to pick up and go, this time with company. I want to show Ash the world.

7 Responses to “Wander Lust”

  1. Yuri Says:

    I often miss the excitement and passion of fresh explorations, both inward and outward. The term so often used is “carefree”… except that it never really was, was it? I remember (and miss) the adventure and travel, but I also remember (and don’t miss AT ALL) the scrabbling, broke, desperate, hungry, and often lonely days that came with it.
    These days, instead of allowing myself to feel “comfortable” and/or “settled”, I try to see how my situation might allow me the freedom to travel and explore on my own terms, at my own pace, and with some expectation of a place to come home to.
    Also, whereas travel used to be an all-encompassing endeavorer, I’ve become so much more embracing of the “getaway”, the random weekend in the city, the last-minute cross-country flights with little/no itinerary.
    Instead of the “leave one life behind and start a new life elsewhere” mode of travel, I’m now able to indulge in less-intensive yet more-frequent travels. Although it might sound it, I’m no “vacationer”!
    GO! Such an awesome time to travel with a child! By the time I was Ash’s age, my folks had taken me camping through every western state and deep into Central America. I have these great early-childhood memories of rural Guatemala and Mexico that have consistently and positively shaped my adult outlook on the world.

  2. Liz Says:

    Oh wow, you look so YOUNG. Not that you look old or something now, but you look about 12 or something.

  3. Charley Says:

    My Mum did it with me. We would just disappear and travel for months at a time, by the time I was 14 I’d moved house 24 times. Crazy. Amazing in many ways but also unsettling and it’s left a legacy of restlessness with me that I’m still trying hard to conquer. I say do it, it’s one of the best things you can give a child but do it while he’s young, once I hit my teens I needed stability (didn’t get it) like whoa.

  4. Lisa Says:

    I’m in Kenya…you guys can come stay with me!

  5. typealice Says:

    Liz: It was before/during I spent so much time in the sun without using ANY SPF. Also, I’m completely makeup free there. Maybe that has something to do with looking so young?

  6. april Says:

    I am settled down, and happy to be. I can’t handle uncertainty and aloofness, it doesn’t seem to be in my nature. I have heard “get an education and a good, decent job” too many times in my upbringing to be happy with the uncertainty that Yuri describes of traveling broke. Having said that, it seems the opposite is truly in your blood but I still can’t help but say that “settling down” and “settling” are two very different things. There is nothing wrong with wanting a comfortable life and a little adventure. Take advantage of vacation times, go to South America for two or three weeks and see how it suits you now before jumping in with both feet and giving up the stability that comes with settling down.

  7. michelle Says:

    From someone you don’t know, that feeling doesn’t stop when you’re 43, either.

    I say follow your heart. Support follows in your happiness.
    (I hope I can follow that same advice, for what that’s worth)

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